Hi Emma,
This time of the year is becoming extremely hard for me, academically and emotionally. I feel so burnt out and unmotivated to do any of my class work. I’ve even started oversleeping and getting late to class, and I NEVER do that! I just don’t know what to do because I’m so stressed out, but I have no one to blame but myself for this. I also feel like I can’t complain because there are so many other people who have it way worse than I do. I guess I’m just wondering if you have any advice on what to do.
- A
Dear A,
First of all, I wish I could give you a hug because it sounds like you could really use it. Secondly, let me just tell you that you are not alone in this at all. Right now is always one of the worst times of the year because everyone is tired, and everyone just wants to go home. The weather is changing and everyone’s immune systems are deciding to overreact, which just adds to the stress of this time of year. And then, it’s finals coming soon, so, A, you absolutely have a right to be tired and burnt out. And you are also absolutely not alone. You do not have to suffer in silence because you think that your problems are less important than other people’s problems. I think one of the first things you need to do is tell someone you trust how you’re feeling. Good friends will know how to support you (and I hope they give you that hug).
Then, after you tell someone how you’re feeling, I think it would be good for you to just take a second, sit down in a quiet place, and just check in with yourself. Stress can oftentimes wash over us and make it seem like it has to take precedence over your own wellbeing. So just check in with yourself, and let yourself feel how you’re feeling. If you feel really crappy (which you probably will, unfortunately), then go take a nice long shower and give yourself a few minutes to just relax and breathe. Once you’re done with your shower, sit down, drink water, and figure out what you need to do first. Getting started is sometimes the hardest part, so make sure you’re not distracted by your phone or social media. Then, just give it a try to get something done.
I’m not sure how much this will help, but I sincerely hope that you can feel a little bit better and feel at least motivated enough to get through the rest of the block.
I believe in you,
Emma
Hi Emma,
Recently, I’ve been having a really hard time with scheduling work around my school, especially with the block schedule. I told my manager about the block schedule when I was applying for the job, and he seemed alright with it. But, he’s been scheduling me during my class times, and I can’t miss class. But I really need this job. So I guess I’m asking: when do the demands of work take priority over school?
– L
Hi L,
That definitely does not sound like a fun time, and I’m very sorry that you are going through this. I think many college students struggle with this, not just at Hastings. It can be really hard to juggle work, school, and also possibly have a life outside of those things, which proves to be even more difficult when your boss does not seem to want to work with you on figuring these things out. But this is a very interesting question that you’re asking. School is very important, but you need to pay for it by doing this job. This is very much a Catch-22 dilemma you’re in, but I personally think there might be a solution or possibly even a start of a solution.
My advice is three things. First, I think you might need to have a sit down chat with your manager about your dilemma. You told me that you made it clear to them that we are on a block schedule that changes, and they hired you with that in mind. But you have a right as an employee to advocate for yourself about this. It is not unreasonable for you to feel like you are not being heard. Be respectful and non accusatory, but be firm. Now, I know that some managers are just mean and unreasonable, so I completely understand if you skip the first thing. But the second thing is to talk with your professors about what is happening. Most professors here at Hastings are pretty awesome in their understanding of what college students are going through. You really do not have to suffer in silence, I promise. However, if you have just not been showing up to class and not communicating with your professors, I will say that they might be more hesitant to help out, so just be aware of that. My third piece of advice is to consider which thing you value more. I know this is probably going to sound very stupid and unhelpful, but it really might be time to find a new job. There are many jobs around campus and around Hastings that understand the Hastings College schedule and are very willing to work with you. However, if you feel like this job might be the starting point for a career, and college is really getting in the way of that, it might be time to consider whether or not college is for you. And I know you’re probably like “I’ve been here __ years, I’m not quitting,” but sometimes college just is not for everybody, and that’s okay.
This is a very difficult question for me to answer, and I am sorry if my advice is not what you were looking for. I wish you only the best of luck with this, and, again, I’m so sorry that this is something that you are dealing with right now.
Sincerely,
Emma
Hey Emma! I’m struggling to feel academic validation as we approach the first finals season of the year. I’m really overwhelmed with anxiety about school and life balance and need advice so the next block is easier.
Melancholy M
Hi Melancholy M,
First of all, I’m very sorry you feel this way right now. Especially during finals week, that feeling is actually the worst.
Academic validation can be a good motivator for us students, but it can also be a beast. If this is your first year of college, or even if it isn’t, attaching your self-worth to how well you can do in school is not entirely healthy. But I just want to let you know before I give you any advice, you are valuable just for being you. I want to start with that and make it crystal clear: You are enough. College is a brand new experience for basically everyone here, and it is hard. Especially since we are on the block schedule here at Hastings, this is a huge change in your life. Give yourself some grace to not be used to this change just yet. That is completely okay.
Okay, now, onto my advice for next block. My advice is to use your Google Calendar, or a planner, or a journal, just something that you can write down and see. If this is new for you, this will take some discipline, but I can tell you it is worth it. Schedule out your school life pretty rigidly, and make time for going and studying somewhere that is not your dorm at least twice a week (trust me, it helps to not be in the same place as where you sleep). Now, once you have a nice ridgid schedule for school, you can use the rest of that time for your life. Go out and have a fun time with your friends, or take four hours to just lay in bed and scroll through social media. That is your time to do with as you wish, so literally do whatever you want with it (although probably don’t do anything illegal–that’s some good advice). Being a college student is about balance, but you have to be responsible to make that balance. If you can be a little disciplined, then I can almost guarantee that next block is going to be okay.
Keep your head up!
Emma
Hi Emma,
We’re almost three weeks into school, and I am still having trouble sleeping. I thought maybe if I got into the groove of college I could help myself get to sleep, but I’m always just so stressed and nothing feels like it’s working. Any suggestions would be really helpful.
-F
Hi F,
First of all, I’m really sorry that you’ve been having trouble sleeping. On top of the stress from starting back up at school, it’s even harder when you’re exhausted from a lack of sleep. And trust me, I’ve been there. You’re lying in bed and your thoughts are deafening as you’re trying to shut them off and sleep. It’s vicious and I empathize.
But … you may be in luck. I have found something that helps me go to sleep pretty easily, and I would love to share it with you. Keep in mind, this is not something that I thought of originally. I found it in an article in Women’s Health Magazine and decided to give it a try, and it seemed to help!
The technique to fall asleep is called “cognitive shuffling” and you can look up the science to it if you’d like. I’m just here to give you some advice. Anyway, what you’re going to do is think of a random word that you can visualize (I personally like to start with a 4-6 letter word). Let’s take the word “city” for example. Visualize a city, like with the skyscrapers and everything. Then take the first letter of city “C” and think of a word you can visualize that begins with “C” like “cat” and visualize that. Keep doing that for the rest of the letters. Once you’re done with that word, you can think of another 4-6 letter word to do this exercise with. This should relax your brain enough to maybe get some rest after a long day.
I really hope that this helps if you try it.
Sweet Dreams!
Emma
Hi Emma,
Okay, I don’t know if you’ve noticed this, but it feels like there’s a new vibe on campus. I really can’t tell if it’s positive or negative, but I feel like it’s there. Am I just going crazy, or is this really something that is happening?
-C
Hi C (teehee like the drink!),
I really don’t think you’re crazy. There’s definitely something new about Hastings College this year, and I think almost everyone who is returning from last year feels it, too. So, just like Randall from “Monsters, Inc.” who said, “Do you hear that? It’s the winds of change,” I feel like we’re feeling these new changes on campus.
This new food in the dining hall is probably one of the biggest factors to the new vibe on campus. Sorry not sorry to a certain food distributor, but last year’s food did not help in making people feel great about being on campus. Finding out that we would be getting a new food distributor last year was a shock, but it gave us a sliver of hope that maybe things would get a little bit better for this tiny college in the middle of Nebraska. And so far, I think I can tentatively say that they have gotten better. As returning students have noticed, there are fewer options available for food, but the options that are available are full of flavor and also fully cooked. When students are served food that doesn’t make them feel sad, I think that makes campus life much livelier.
Another reason why I think there is a new vibe on campus is the renovations happening and being planned on campus. As any Hastings veteran knows, Weyer Hall has been an empty building for a couple of years now, with only the Theater Department using it for its annual haunted house during Halloween. Now, as we see fences going up around Weyer, we are feeling a sense of movement on campus, a feeling that has been missing at least since I’ve been here. I think that is absolutely adding to this new vibe on campus.
Now, I know this feeling of movement and change can be scary, but I really think that we’re feeling a positive vibe going around. Hastings may be entering a new era, if you will (that was for all of my Swifties out there). As we tentatively look forward to the future, I think Hastings College students will find a new sense of hope. Let’s keep believing that this will last.
I know that wasn’t really advice, but C, I really don’t think you’re going crazy. Hope that helps.
Sincerely,
Emma